What is NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming)

So, what is NLP?

Imagine having to give a speech in front of an important audience.

You have prepared.

You know your stuff.

Nevertheless, you feel anxious.

Fact is, the closer the speech comes the more your anxiety grows and is just about to overwhelm you.

Then you realize it’s time to take a moment and calm yourself down with your NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) skills. Good thing you have them. Especially now.

You sit down, follow the steps of a good NLP technique you know and immediately you feel your anxiety dissipate and your confidence grow.

Now you feel much better.

That is what Neuro Linguistic Programming does for you.

And it doesn’t matter if it is a fear of public speaking, of meeting an attractive person of the opposite sex, or getting rid of a phobia.  

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What is NLP?

What is NLP and what it does for YOU

NLP lets you control your inner state and empowers you to show and do your best in every situation.

Now that you know how to confidently control your inner state (your feelings) with NLP you’re in an important meeting.

Depending on your situation, this meeting could be with an attractive person of the opposite sex, a client or a business partner.

Whatever your situation, you know that to achieve what you envision and deserve you need to communicate elegantly and effectively.

You need to put the person at ease. You need to build trust. You need to deeply understand what they want so you can give it to them and, in turn, get what you want. 

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What is NLP?

What is NLP and what it does for YOU

NLP helps you communicate elegantly and effectively so you easily and ethically get what you want. 

You’re in a difficult situation involving a complex negotiation.

The other party is using every trick in the book to undermine your confidence and to convince you to give in to unreasonable demands.

Only they do it so well by sweet talking, threatening, delaying and using all power negotiation strategies you can think of that their unreasonable demands start to feel acceptable and even the right thing to do.

You’re almost ready to give in – to take the managerial job with just a token increase in pay and perks, sign a deal that’ll put your company in a very strained financial situation or to agree that your significant other is entitled to freedom that frankly will almost legitimize their cheating on you.

But before you fall pray to the master negotiator in front of you, you simply turn to your NLP tools and techniques.

You calm and ground yourself.

You see through the sweet talk, threats and delays and realize how, from a position of stability and inner strength, to turn the situation in your favor.

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What is NLP?

What is NLP and what it does for YOU

NLP helps you stay centered, calm and confident in difficult communications (negotiations).

NLP helps you see through the smoke and mirrors. NLP helps you make good decisions. NLP helps you achieve your goals.

 (Naturally, NLP helps you if you have been trained well and have acquired the right NLP principles and techniques.) 

You have lost your way. You have lost hope.

This sometimes happens when people lose a close one, or when they have lost themselves.

In dark situations like these Neuro Linguistic Programming helps you find the strength and light inside. Gently and patiently take hold of it and make it bigger and brighter.

You’ve heard of people who have recovered even from the direst of losses – personal, emotional or financial.

What they’ve done to recover could be done (replicated) by anybody. If you know how.

So, what is NLP and what it does for YOU?

NLP gives you the how – the tools and techniques to rise above any situation – to keep you stable, strong and growing.

How was Neuro Linguistic Programming developed?

NLP originated in the early 1970s.

It was developed by Dr. Richard Bandler and Dr. John Grinder.

Dr. Richard Bandler – co-creator of NLP
Dr. John Grinder – co-creator of NLP

Some of their early students and people who have contributed to the development of NLP are David Gordon, Robert Dilts, Judith Delozier and others.

Richard Bandler and John Grinder put the foundations of NLP by studying Virginia Satir (founder of Family Systems Therapy), Fritz Perls (founder of Gestalt Therapy) and Milton H. Erickson (the foremost psychiatrist / hypnotherapist of his time).

Richard Bandler and John Grinder used a process called modelling, which is at the heart of NLP, to unearth and duplicate the language structure and behavioral patterns that allowed Milton H. Erickson, Virginia Satir and Fritz Perls to produce outstanding, bordering on magical, positive change in their clients.

Later, Dr. Bandler, Dr. Grinder and some of their students, using the NLP modelling process, expanded the applications of Neuro Linguistic Programming in business – marketing, management, sales, negotiations etc.

I’m Alex Popov, the person behind NLPverse, and I’ve studied NLP Practitioner, NLP Master Practitioner and NLP Trainer directly under the co-creator of NLP, Dr. Richard Bandler.

Alex Popov, the person behind NLPverse. Alex studied NLP Practitioner, NLP Master Practitioner and NLP Trainer directly from the co-creator of NLP, Dr. Richard Bandler.

What are some of the most powerful NLP principles, models, tools and techniques?

What is NLP and what it does for YOU

NLP Principle:

“All people create a map of reality inside their mind.”

Most of the time, this map is exceedingly useful.

But there are instances when we confuse the map with reality.

And this can lead to all sorts of insidious problems such as …

… Not understanding each other well leading to arguments and dissatisfaction

… False expectations leading to disappointment and frustration

… Missing out on growth opportunities because we fail to see them blinded by false beliefs, habits and Meta Programs

… And more!

Foundational NLP Principles and Techniques for Coding and Decoding Your Internal Reality:

What is NLP and what it does for YOU

Some people mostly SEE the world.

Others mostly FEEL it.

And still others mostly HEAR it.

This is a simplification, of course. But it shows you a small but significant chunk of the ways we people unconsciously organize our internal world and build our specific maps of reality.

(There’s a TON more to this, of course.)

NLP Principles for Building Almost Instant Believability and Trust:

What is NLP and what it does for YOU

In NLP this is called rapport.

Richard Bandler and John Grinder discovered that master communicators in any field – therapeutic or business – have unconscious ways of putting all they speak with at ease.

And when the person you’re communicating with is at ease they inherently trust you. And it’s much easier for you to help them see, believe and accept your point of view.

This opens the doors for you to help them get what they want while you get what you want.

NLP principles and techniques for building powerful internal states so you can be grounded and in sync with yourself.

What is NLP and what it does for YOU

When you’re grounded and in sync with yourself, you’re naturally much more stable, believable and powerful in every way. 

You deal with your problems decisively.

And you achieve your goals easier and faster.

The NLP Milton Model:

What is NLP and what it does for YOU

The NLP Milton Model is Dr. Milton H. Erickson’s hypnotic way of “installing” positive change in his clients.

When grasped and used well the Milton Model is indispensable in any communication situation – marketing, management, sales, negotiations, therapy – in any persuasive communication.

The NLP Meta Model:

What is NLP and what it does for YOU

So far as I know, the NLP Meta Model is based on the work of family therapist Virginia Satir (founder of Family Systems Therapy) and Fritz Perls (Founder of Gestalt Therapy).

The NLP Meta Model helps you understand your clients, friends and family on a deep and complete level.

For when people speak, they use unconscious short cuts. These short cuts are sometimes useful. But sometimes they cover hidden problem areas.

In your personal life these hidden problem areas are most often what your partner truly wants and how they really feel as opposed to what they tell you.

In business these hidden problem areas are most often what your client truly wants and how they really feel about your proposition.

In therapy these hidden problem areas are most often what keeps your client (or you) stuck in the problem and what stops them from getting better.

The NLP Meta Model helps you uncover these hidden problem areas and shows you specific ways of moving past them on to the desired solution.

The NLP Stories and Metaphors Model:

What is NLP and what it does for YOU

This is an amazing extension of the NLP Milton Model.

Dr. Milton H. Erickson (the foremost psychiatrist / hypnotherapist of his time) discovered the power of the therapeutic story and metaphor.

And in his later life used these almost exclusively to invoke positive change in his patients.

The NLP Stories and Metaphors model is based on what Dr. Erickson discovered.

NLP practitioners extended the applications into the business and personal communication fields.

Because, you see, stories and metaphors are embedded as a form of conveying powerful messages and lessons starting as far back as when people lived in caves and drew pictures on stones and walls.

Used skillfully, NLP Stories and Metaphors help you get your message across without resistance and grant you the desired outcome – positive personal or therapeutic change, the sale or whatever you aim for.

The NLP Decoding of Verbal and Non-Verbal Communication Model:

What is NLP and what it does for YOU

There’s a story of Dr. Milton H. Erickson and a woman entering his office.

She entered carefully, self-consciously. She told him her husband wanted to move to another state. But she could not move as she was afraid of flying.

Dr. Erickson excused himself but said he didn’t see her enter his office and could she go out and enter again.

A bit confused she obeyed. She entered in the same careful, self-conscious way. Adjusted her skirt just so, sat down and told him the same story.

Upon which, Dr. Erickson asked her, “Madam, you know that when you visit your psychiatrist, in order to get the help you need, it’s best you tell him the truth, don’t you agree?”

A bit more confused she answered, “Yes.”

He looked at her carefully and asked, “Madam, does your husband know you’re having an affair?”

She sat flabbergasted, and answered, “No, but how do you?”

How did he?

You see, Dr. Milton H. Erickson had learned to see and discover the hidden meanings of unconscious communication and behavior.

You can learn to expand your senses and see and discover what really is going on around you.

I got to tell you it’s great in business dealings.

For it’s very difficult for people to trick or lie to you.

You won’t ever not get paid. You’ll know what deals are worth pursuing and what deals will waste your time.

But I got to warn you, in personal life you’re going to spoil a lot of surprises, if your significant other loves to try to surprise you, since you’ll almost immediately detect something’s being hidden from you and soon discover what it is.

But if you can live with this, the NLP decoding of verbal and non-verbal communication is a near magical skill to possess.

The NLP Reframing Model:

What is NLP and what it does for YOU

Several months ago, I was helping a client – let’s call him John.

John’s problem was that his client, let’s call him Bill, wanted to pay him just a flat fee and not a percentage of the deal they were working on.

Bill argued that by paying John a 10% commission he was almost making him a partner in his business and he wasn’t okay with it.

John didn’t know what to say or do to turn the situation around. Yet, it didn’t feel fair to him to get paid only a flat fee as his contribution to putting that deal together was significant. But he was stuck as to what to say or do to convince Bill to agree to the commission.

Among other things, I suggested John tell Bill that by paying him a flat fee plus a 10% commission for successfully completing the deal Bill wasn’t making John a partner or losing leverage in his business in any way.

The flat fee and the commission would be a strong and fair motivation for John to do his best to close the deal. So, Bill could get 90% of the profit and use it to grow his business bigger and stronger.

This, and a few other things I suggested, did the trick and John and Bill made a very profitable and mutually satisfying deal.

They still work together to this day.

I could go on and on about the benefits of NLP …

For that’s just scratching the surface as to what Neuro Linguistic Programming is and what it can do for you.

And if you’re interested in any of this, I invite you to subscribe now to my FREE NLPverse Email Newsletter.

Where I’ll share with you more of my personal experience with NLP – my and my clients’ personal, therapeutic and business stories as well as more useful NLP principles and techniques.

Subscribe now.

Best,

Alex Popov

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